In the Des Moines Civic Center parking lot.
A battered limo drives up. The front windshield is cracked, and pieces of white picket fence are being dragged behind the car. The car comes to a stop, cover three spaces. Smoke issues from the engine. The car sputters on and one, and shakes slightly. A passenger door falls off as Wevv crawls out. On the other side, Mr. Wang steps out shakily, and leans on the car for support. A violent shudder passes through him. Wevv crawls a few feet from the car, and gets to his knees. He looks upwards and spreads his arms.
Wevv: Thank GOD we’re not in Kansas anymore!
The drivers die door opens and grinning doughy man steps out. He tips back his chauffeurs hat and moves over to help Wevv up. Wevv shakes him off, and Mr. Wang quickly steps around the car, and helps Wevv up. Wevv turns to the driver and starts to yell at him.
Wevv: Don’t TOUCH me you ignorant Buffoon! I should have known better than to trust a driver hired by Villiano! And to think I trusted such a man to drive me all the way here from Kansas. Oh well, it’s being billed to Villiano.
Wevv looks skyward again, but this time his face is etched with hatred. He clenches his fist and shakes it as he hisses:
Driver: I sure am sorry sir, but I did drive you all the way from Kansas. I have no idea how you wound up there instead of Des Moines! But I hear this town has plenty of great things! Sure wouldn’t mind sitting a spell and seeing the sights!
Wevv leans I and whispers to Mr. Wang, before gaining his composure and his bearing. Mr. Wang sidles off as Wevv distracts the driver. Mr. Wang moves to the front of the car and drops down to scoot underneath it.
Wevv: Really? I must confess sir, I know very little about this town. And I do apologize for my outburst. It’s just my frustration with my travel arrangements. That and that, ahem” shortcut” through the barn rattled me. Now, you say there are great sights in Des Moines? Like what pray tell?
Driver: Well, sir, you seem like the type that likes those fancy dancy things. I do know that the Des Moines Art Center has many fine works from contemporary artists. Did you know they have as a par to of their permanent collection of Jasper John’s Tennyson? And Henri Matisse’s Woman in White, Georgia O’Keeffe’s From the Lake No. 1, and Francis Bacon’s Study after Velásquez’s Portrait of Pope Innocent X? The Permanent Collections includes a number of collections that have been established through donation of funds or bequests of artwork. These collections include the Irma and Julian Brody Collection, John C. Huseby Print Collection, Louise Noun Collection of Art by Women, Paul and Anastasia Polydoran Collection, and most notably the Nathan Emory Coffin Collection. Can you believe that?
Wevv: Actually, no, I can’t. And I’m even more surprised that you would know the names, much less the actual works of these artists.
Mr. Wang gets to his feet, and dusts himself off. He gives Wevv a thumbs up.
Wevv: But I mustn’t keep you. Your love of art has fueled my desire and I must make haste to see these wonderful collections. But alas, I have business to discuss within you domicile. Until we meet again, Farewell and safe travels good sir!
Driver: Aw shucks, tweren't nothin! You take care sir, and be sure to check out those paintings! I hear they got themselves Sean Scully’s “Wall of Light Red Night” on display right now!
Wevv: I will be sure to check it out. Ta!
Wevv turns and walks quickly away and towards the arena.
Wevv: Buffoon! Damn you Villiano! Booking my flight into Kansas! Well played, but the next, ah, the next round shall be mine!
Wevv walks past the security guard who tips his hat, smiles his three teeth at Wevv and goes back to shucking corn. Wevv just shakes his head. He opens his mouth to speak to Mr. Wang, but closes it and shakes his head again. He doesn’t make it far, when Crotchman catches him.
Crotch: WEVV! You’re late! Come on, you gotta cut a promo!
Crotch grabs Wevv’s arm and starts hustling him down the halls. Wevv is so shocked he lets Crotch drag him, until he finally pulls back and stops.
Wevv: What the hell are you doing here?!?
Crotch: Huh? Oh, Vil flew me in just to interview you. Come on!
Wevv stands, staring off into space. Crotch rushes a few steps forward, until he finally realizes he is alone. He turns back to Wevv.
Wevv: I hate that man. I really do... Come on, let’s get this over with.
Wevv stalks over to the set, while Crotch scrambles to catch up. Crotch grabs a mic and takes his mark in front of the cameras. He smoothes down his eyebrows, as the director counts down.
Crotch: HEY PWA FANS! Crotchman here with an exclusive interview with-URK!
Wevv had moved onto the set, and grabbed the mic, while Mr. Wang grabs Crotch and slaps a headlock on him.
Wevv: No time for banter Crotch! You want a promo, you got one!
Wevv: Villiano! You rotten son of a bitch! You Vile Miscreant you! You have (*Bleeped*) with me for the last time! Oh, we have had our battles over the past year, always off camera! But now, ah, NOW, I can finally get my hands on you! Indeed, now you finally feel my displeasure! But the burring question in the slower amongst you troglodytes is why? Why do you hate Villiano so? Well, you will finally have your answer! I hate Villiano because…because…oh, so many reasons, it’s hard to find one to start with…is it the way he runs his company like a romper room? The way he barely lifts a hand? Is it his style of management? His (*bleep*) off attitude? The way he surrounds himself with circus acts? Or the way he clings to his glory days and ignores the future?
Wevv leans into the camera. His voice is low and filled with menace and hatred.
Wevv: No, my simple friends. It’s much more than that. You see, I KNOW Villiano. I know what he is capable of. And for months, I have watched much less capable hands STEAL his company away. He practically GAVE his company to those Bright and Shiny fools. The pig headed, money grubbing MAN WHORE was blinded by the money he THOUGHT he could make. And in the end, IT’S NOT EVEN HIS!
Wevv wipes his mouth and steps back; he turns to Mr. Wang and yells.
Wevv: WHAT KIND OF RETARD... GAH! It galls me to no end! But all of that is about to change. I will happily take Villiano’s money, as I have on SOOO many occasions. There’s an axiom that you should never mix business with pleasure. Well, I was never one for following the rules and let me tell you. This is going to be a pleasure.
Wevv: Which brings me to Phantom Lord. Ah Phantom. Master of the Mind Games. Bah, let me tell you something boy. I am an accomplished hunter. A predator if you will. A LION of the corporate world. And you should never dangle raw meat in front of a lion. A hungry lion. With your bare hands. I know you as well. I have watched you bumbling around backstage, hatching your little plots and string the pot. Oh, you got me in the end. My tag team belts are gone. Now my taste fro gold goes unrequited. But that will change soon enough. But my hunger must be appeased. And what better way than to beat a Champion at his own game! And this will be just a TASTE of what’s to come! Mark my words!
Wevv: And Showstuffer-
Wevv: -Stopper! I don’t believe we have been formally introduced. Allow me. My name is Wevv Mang. In one year, I was the greatest Television Champion of all time. I was a Legendary Tag Team Champion. I put together an Elite Stable that rivaled the greatest stables in the PWA history. I built an empire! Look upon my works and despair! For they are no more. Robbed by an ARMY of my enemies. Betrayed! But not beaten. Defeated, but NEVER beaten. My advice to you? Stay out of my way. I have an empire to rebuild and I won’t think twice about building it on a heap of your bones.
Crotch: And the money isn’t important?
Mr. Wang bonks Crotch on the head and he falls unconscious to the floor.
Wevv: OF COURSE THE MONEY IS IMPORTANT! I know the value of 2 million dollars! Better than anyone in this company apparently! But I will say this. I can be a generous man. All you have to do is take my hand to find out….
Wevv drops the mic and holds out his hand to the camera, and smiles an evil smile, as the camera fades to black.